Now that we’re all taking our Groundhog Day decorations down, the quiet lull after this deeply meaningful holiday is a good time for life reflection.
Sadly, I almost mean that.
Naturally, the holiday always reminds me of the movie “Groundhog Day,” where as you may know, Bill Murray plays Phil Connors, a hapless TV News reporter who finds himself re-living the same day over and over – Feb 2 in Punxsutawney, PA.
Hijinks ensue, of course, and it’s a fun and silly movie to watch with the kids.
But what causes me to reflect is the possibility that it’s funny because there is a kernel of truth to it. The best humor zeroes in on something true or real and looks at it through a different or ridiculous lens.
That’s when it hit me that many days, I am Phil!
Wake up. Kiss my wife. Get the kids ready. Go to work. Drive around. Eat dinner. Watch TV. Fall asleep (hopefully not on the couch.)
Repeat.
And repeat.
And repeat.
Did you ever find yourself driving someplace on a Saturday, and you’re not paying full attention, and before you know it, you’ve take the turn or exit to go to work? Your body and mind are so locked into the routine that they simply run the normal program whether you want it to or not.
And THAT is the key. Routine itself is not a bad thing, so long as it is what we DECIDE to be doing and can engage it fully.
We all do things everyday that are good for the kids or the house or our job. That is not bad. But the question is: is it as good as it could be?
Phil kept running the same program and nothing happened.
Only when Phil takes the reins and chooses his actions with PURPOSE does the world begin to adapt to his decisions, allowing him in the end to break out of the repetitive cycle.
[Apologies for not opening that sentence with “Spoiler alert,” but for God’s sake – the movie is 30 years old!]
We should take time regularly to ask ourselves if we are doing all of our busy activities with purpose? or on auto-pilot?
But don’t take my word for it.
In his highly successful best-seller, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Stephen Covey condenses his years of research on human excellence into the 7 mission critical habits required for success. The very first habit is “Be Proactive.” To succeed, the first step is to ensure we choose our goals and actions.
Which brings us back to Phil Connors. And you. And me.
“I Got You, Babe” is a fine song. But not every morning for the rest of my life simply because that’s what played yesterday. Wouldn’t we love to mix it up and put together a kick-ass playlist that we decide?
Are you on auto pilot with your kids? Practice, rehearsal, test, recital, kiss good night, love you. Yep, many of those things are important and useful habits that move us closer to our goals. But we should also be sure to check in with ourselves and our kids and proactively choose activities that aren’t simply hard-coded into the software.
Usually the hard part is figuring out what the options are. I agree!
That’s what we’re exploring here.
Pick ONE thing to do this week with your kids or partner that is different than the routine – maybe something that has always been on your list but you’ve never had time for. Schedule a couple hours into your calendar each week for “proactive time” and fill it each week with any activity that is not part of the automatic routine.
The first session can even be brainstorming great ideas with your kids to develop a menu of awesome options for subsequent weeks.
The routine is useful and helps us get stuff done. But it’s also important to ensure that the limited time we spend with our family is imbued with purpose, meaning and joy.
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