3.5 Simple Steps for Better Balance

I don’t know about you, but when I heard they were continuing “The Karate Kid” storyline into a Netflix show to catch us up on how their lives turned out 30 years later, my reaction was equal parts “you’ve GOT to be kidding me” and “I HAVE to see that.”  Season 4 of “Cobra Kai” just dropped on December 31, and yes, I’ve watched all 3 seasons so far. 

 

Like many 80’s kids, my favorite character from the original Karate Kid movies was of course Mr. Miyagi – the sage sensei whose karate instruction was equal parts technique and life lessons. To this day, I can not think about waxing a car or painting without hearing him shouting “Wax on, wax off!”  or “Up! Down!”

 

My favorite nugget of Miyagi wisdom by far, though, is “Better learn balance. Balance is key.  Balance good, karate good, everything good.” I liked the line then, and now that I’m a dad with a family and a job and all the stresses of life, I fully appreciate both the importance and difficulty of balance. 

 

But HOW do you actually achieve it?  It’s one thing to say it, but a whole different kettle of fish to live it. 

 

The key insight I’ve learned is that it’s a process, not a project.  If you’re like me, we typically want to fix things quickly and move on. That mindset doesn’t work well for balance, which can either be done quickly or done right.  The good news is that the process is simple, but like pushing a rock up a hill, it requires continuous effort to maintain progress.

 

Below is a simple, effective, 5-minute method to improve our life balance. 

 

1. Pause: Most of us are running around so fast in 20 directions that we may not even take the time to realize the value of trying to figure it out.  You can’t watch the game film while the game is going on, so take a moment outside the game to allocate a few minutes of quiet to improving your balance. 

 

2. Assess:  Once we’ve set aside time, what, specifically, is out of whack?  And how badly? Often we have a general sense that we’re not where we need to be but lack clarity on exactly how. Many dads probably agree they need to “work less” or “spend more time with kids” or “be healthier,” but unclear on exactly how, or which is the biggest offender.  This is where we watch the film and see where and how we need to improve.  Jot them down and what “better” would look like.  Be specific. [Dad Hack: See Dad Quiz link below for a shortcut on this step.]

 

3. Focus: Multi-tasking is a myth – at least the part where the quality of the output is as good as we’d like.  Now that we have a few areas to improve, pick just one and focus only on that for a few weeks. I can’t think about my golf grip, keeping my head down, my arms in and my hips out all at once – I need to focus on one fix until it’s muscle memory.  THEN work on the next one. 

 

3.5 Repeat:  We’ve made progress on our most troubling area, which is great, but we’re not where we want to be. So repeat the process and focus exclusive attention on the next single area that is out of balance. Enter “Balance Check-in” on your calendar to repeat every 3 to 4 weeks to re-run the above and ensure you stay aligned. 

 

The key to improving our life balance is to figure out which area is most unbalanced first, then work on that with our full attention. Once it’s better, do the same for the next area.  Set aside a few minutes on the same day every month to pause and assess. 

 

Every month you will make progress on the area that is pulling you most off kilter.  This leads to a life balance that is not only improved, but sustainable.